Where Are We Heading To?

This blog has seemingly served as my journal lately. I haven't posted anything that I just, in fact, use as a bookmark and a way of saving the links I want to go back and visit again someday as references. I originally intended to make this place a virtual public diary, where I could put my thoughts down in writing and conclude them at the end of the day.

Every day is treated to be another challenge to take, a new way of improving myself progressively. Today I worked straight 12 hours. Why? Not because I get paid a lot of money for it (not even close) but because it is a responsibility. If I can't be good at little things how can I handle big things in the future. I'm a born dreamer, I mean a day-dreamer. I could spend the whole day sitting by the window with my hands cradling my face watching the birds in the backyard fly around the trees and dream of the future. That's how I technically spent my childhood. I go to school during weekdays and I didn't feel I was there at all. Just like, 'I am looking at you but I am not seeing you' type of thing. Weird huh?!

My childhood basically best described as TRAPPED. Like a self-made prison. Within me and the things around me. But I am way over it now. I love my parents especially my Mother. My sister whom I consider my best-friend, she's a replica of my Mom -- in all aspects.

Obviously, I am dreamy right now. Practically just writing down these tangled thoughts. I was
just reading about someone's post on her blog, and on her way on becoming ATTY at LAW in the future. I guess we're on the same page. My ultimate dream.




"Keep digging the soil, you might not know what lies beneath. Could be a chestful of gold -- or diamonds.
"

-MF



It's Love

I am really bed-bound now. I worked triple time again today. 6 days a week there's always somebody who calls in at work. And tomorrow I gladly (and excitedly)offer my service to work 12 straight hours. Sick, no transportation, tired, what else? Just say, I'm too lazy to work anymore. Seriously, I never heard anybody say I'm so excited to go to work, I guess it's just me. You can never find anybody else who is eager to go to work than me. Don't ask me why, just need some $$$$.

I should really be upstairs by now or I would hear somebody calling me, either that or marching down the stairs, hihihi. Soweee. I was looking at this Horoscope for the year 2009, I don't necessarily believe what it says but it's fun to know ONLY if it's positive. Somehow when I read things about my future either I would try my best askew the fate or I am gonna go against it doesn't even matter if it's good or bad. Obnoxious.

Ahh, nothing is more powerful than love. Someone just said no matter how much money you got if you don't have love you're nothing. But, what if I (inluv) love money does that count? Truth is if all you have is love and no money, LOVE becomes HATRED. And it's called hypocrisy. LOL.

If all I have is you, then I need nothing else.
-MF

So How Is Christmas Celebrated

Holidays are just a normal season in my world here, or so it seems. In comparison to how people celebrate here and the Philippines. It is a big thing in the Philippines, while they take everything so seriously and get too excited about just everything, Americans DO get excited but it's more of mutual and not to be taken so seriously -- or at least not too evident.

I finally understood how they are. We Filipinos, for example, if we get unexpected help from strangers or simply any help from anyone we would thank them ten times to show them we appreciated the deed. In the USA, according to observation, they would say 'Thank You, I appreciate it' and that's about it.

Only shows that people are more relaxed and formal I should say here. Although, being hailed from a different world, I like our way better, Christmas is like having a feast and celebration.

Getting Cozy...

..and warm by the FIRE.

Just a little update on Christmas day. I promised to take pictures of our actual Christmas tree with the gifts but I woke up too late this morning. It's nice to cuddle-up-til-your-head-hurt some days when you don't need to get up early and rush to work or school. So when I got up and ran downstairs coz I remembered I wanted to take a few snaps, but Mike and Mary were already downstairs so I felt awkward to grab the camera and take every angle of tree. Oh well...

Ham was started on the crock pot early on and I was so anxious to eat the thing, couldn't wait til tonight. I should say it was worth the wait, even though it was just me and Mike who had dinner together I totally savored the ham. (I only eat ham once a year, not even on sandwich) Of course I had 3 trips to the kitchen, there would be another year gap between anyways so no guilt at all.

At 10am we opened our presents, I was excited for them to open their presents (especially the ones I got them, hihi). Quite happy.

Right now I'm sitting by the fire, leaning on the wall with my back to it. It surely is soothing, keeps me warm.

A few times today, I attempted to do some online shopping but most sites were 'under maintenance routine'? Is that normal? Blessing in disguise, or I would have actually bought the shoes I wanted and a couple other things. When I got to checkout the note suddenly popped out. I guess I should just find a way to get time to go to the mall one of these days.

Happy Holidays

I am still in awe thinking that in a few hours it'll be Christmas day. The last Christmas is still freshly and clearly remembered in my memory. My first Christmas in the USA. Completely different. Quiet. Peaceful. Ham. Just mutual LOVE and giving. In the Philippines, families gather together on Christmas Eve. Crowded, funful, tableful of foods, fireworks everywhere. Exactly opposite. I honestly don't have any preference how I like the season celebrated, either way is an experience and marks the end of the year as well. Just because as I got older, my cousins and even my family grew apart, led different lives, parted ways. Not that we hate each other but we just aren't good get-together organizers. We definitely love each other but we inhibit the emotions most of the time. This just reminds me of my departed Mother, who, if she would have been living right now, somehow love has remained in the family and kept the spirit intact. And as she left, it's vigorously faded away. Thats what a mother could do, and her absence takes the big part of the family graph. If she was here how different everything could be? Huge.

But, when I moved here in the US. I found a new family. People who sincerely care about me, appreciate me, stay with me, guide me when I'm lost instead of throwing me out of the door, patiently understanding me. Inside and outside my home. I find true people that I encounter everyday, learn from them. I keep growing and living.

2007 we had a tiny re-cycled Christmas tree, this year we have 6' tall Christmas tree even though it isn't a real tree it's colorful, and it's surrounded with pile of gifts. [note: the picture has the same setting but not the actual picture of our tree, i will do that early tomorrow, promiseee, can't let it pass]

Last Christmas, even though it wasn't sad nor eventful, I didn't get to take any pictures but the picture of my feet and my new slippers that was part of the gifts that I got. Funny, that was the only time I wore them I lost the right pair and ever found it since.

I am exorbitantly happy this Christmas, how about you?

Anyone?

Call me desperate but I really (want) need to go shopping tomorrow and I can't drive in this friggin weather (I mean I can't drive by myself yet). Problem is I don't have anybody to go with me. I have a few things I need to get.

My friends are all working during the day. All I have is Rudy our dog!

No public transportation or access near the place I want to go. Whateverrrr.... I'm totally stuck here.

Weather is bad, and I'd be alone at home, thank God I agreed to work in the afternoon so I don't really have to stay at home all day longgggg.


Vent All I Want

Happy Holidays!

{My title suggested that I was going to complain about a lot of things going on that I didn't want to deal with today but I changed the plot. After all it's Holiday and we should just count our blessings instead, life is beautiful so why not enjoy it?}

I started trying to write this post since I woke up this morning but started doing the chores here and got hooked, umf! I mean I got hooked browsing on the net. Totally nonsense things.
Well, a few days before the 'Merry Christmas' day, what are the things on my mind? Excited to open the gifts? Uhm, kinda. we have a big fake Christmas tree this time, last year we had a tiny, recycled one and it's good for a change.

I meant to do some updates here on what I've been doing and why I haven't posted any in the last week, but I already forgot what kept me busy, hehe. Except the main highlights which the recent lumpectomy that I had a week ago, not much going on really. Also, the constant complains I hear from people is the weather. Never-ending snow for the last week has been dreadful, making people want to stay home all through out the season.


On the other hand, I was browsing through old pictures when I last visited Philippines and found this one that I was forcing Mike to eat balut and of course by convincing him that it's safe to have balut in his system I was showing him that I was eating one. But I disappointed him. "You're a fake Filipino" he says. Because I couldn't eat the poor thing myself. Well, after all the negative comments about it from different people. I couldn't do it, sorry. Or nobody dared me enough.

Meanwhile, the snow has been crazzzzy all day. I mean did he even think of visiting some other place for a change? I swear to God not only that the wind is blowing in every direction. I could hear the whiz and the flurries have gotten big in the afternoon. This picture was taken last Winter, and honestly, the last winter I had wasn't as bad as what we're having now. Snow on the pathwalk is twice as much. Driving isn't easy either. Thank God I don't have to drive to go to work, it's just accross the road!

Another thing, my college enrollment is confirmed? How did I know? Coz I just paid the deposit today and I am getting my schedule anytime soon through the website designed for students (webforstdents). Something to look forward to.

It's nice to do a little update.

Get That Job!

I am always on my way to success, no matter how little, or big. Big accomplishments start from small ones.

How much effort do you put in your future success? How big are your dreams? What are the simple steps or guides you do to reach them?

Every single experience and challenge you encounter each day of your life could take you where you want to be someday. Always welcome the challenges and you are opening your door to success as well. I think being able to communicate at the right time and place righteously is a talent, also experience could contribute to it. Getting the job that you want starts from the Interview and everything else depends on you. I found this helpful tips to build a good communication between you and the Interviewer, we all could use in the future.

Interview Chemistry:

1. Share commonalities
Discuss your passion for your field or enthusiasm for a new product or service, as well as personal commonalities such as family (i.e., children of the same age), recreational activities, hobbies or interests.

2. L.I.S.T.E.N. attentively
Laser your focus. Investigate and be curious. Silence your tongue -- hold your judgment and open your mind. Take brief notes and take time to formulate your response. Elevate the other person. Note the nonverbal, including your body language and that of your interviewer. It is impossible to connect with others if you don't listen well.

3. R.E.S.P.O.N.D. well
R
emember your objective; Engage the interviewer. Share succinctly. Point to benefits. Offer proof. Never drone on. Dedicate yourself to a win-win relationship.

4. Pay attention to the 'howchas'
The "howchas" are how you say something (as opposed to what you say). Tone, inflection, body language, attitude and motive combine to make how you say it just as important as what you say. To improve your 'howcha's,' remain deferential, respectfully curious and concerned about the interviewer/company's welfare. Use verbal and body language mirroring to enhance communication, matching aspects of your interviewer's voice, language, mannerisms and body language.

5. Recognize their learning style, whether auditory, visual or kinesthetic/tactile.
Offer variety in your interview so that each style is addressed. This might include answering questions for the auditory learners, writing an outline on a whiteboard or showing a PowerPoint demonstration for the visual learners, and engaging the kinesthetic/tactile learners in activities or encouraging them to take more thorough notes.

6. Understand their temperament
Theorists (often seen in executive roles) value impressive training or credentials, and stress vision, logic, innovation, mastery, progress and excellence. Catalysts (often seen in human service roles) value harmony in work relationships and appreciate ideal, meaningful work environments. Stabilizers (often seen in finance and management roles) value factual, reality-based responses in a sequential, detailed fashion. Improvisers (often seen in sales/marketing roles) value action, excitement and variety, and prefer solutions that are practical and effective to help them get what they want.

Making these efforts throughout the interview will go a long way toward impressing the interviewer and positioning yourself ahead of other candidates. Even if you don't win the job offer, the interviewer may be inclined to recommend you to others or keep you in mind for future opportunities if he or she developed a connection with you.

"Acing an interview -- even for a job that isn't perfect for you -- will put you on the radar screen of those who can help you in the future," Whitcomb says. "Remember that interviewers have their own network of contacts that will likely be valuable to you."

Coffee Addiction

Or is it really?
I could feel right now I wouldn't be able to sleep well tonight, one big mistake I keep committing in spite being aware of it's wicked effect. Bad, bad, bad! I keep telling myself. I have become so dependent on coffee lately that I feel like I don't have energy without having my hourly dose of this very un-healthy indulgence.
Is it a necessity or or simply psychological, after all the good effect is short-lived. While on the other hand the bad effect could last more than 24 hours, even more.
Not to mention the 2 doughnuts I could not help eating. I swear, I feel like beating myself up. *fangs!*

Oh dear, see if a glass of milk would wash out the caffeine my body has long absorbed to be rescued.

Thing is I haven't had any coffee the last 2 days, if I don't work I don't feel the need to have any, unless I need to run errands and would require me to run around all day. And that makes it worse, my body would feel that caffeine is a stranger again and react to it violently. Like it does now.

I know I'm a whiner to the deed I did.

Lesson learned:
Be prepared and anticipate the future while you are enjoying yourself now uncontrollably.

That Somebody

-- Somebody who would still pamper me.

-- Somebody who would never get tired of my silly jokes.

-- Somebody who would let me feel superior sometimes.

-- Somebody who would not criticize me most of the times.

-- Somebody who would let me be who I am.

-- Somebody who would listen to me sometimes.

-- Somebody who would treat like a princess that I am.

Is that asking too much? Just need to be loved.

-- Somebody whom I could still ask to carry me and not think I'm crazy.

-- Somebody who wouldn't run away during heated arguments.

-- Somebody whom I could laugh with in the cold nights.

-- Somebody who wouldn't expect so much from me.

-- Somebody who would take 10 minutes apologizing to me.

-- Somebody who wouldn't provoke me to get mad or annoyed.

-- Somebody who would give in to me once in a while -- or let me have my way.

Where'd they all go?

And if forever fades away and so does that feeling. -MF


Those memories I miss
Some promises un-kept
True love faltered?
Gone all the bliss.



True Love >> Eternity >> Sacrifices & Compromises

Anticipation

Since I got the call this morning from the doctor who would perform my incoming minor operation, because I forgot to ask how long I would have to be out of work after the operation. Also, since I can't watch this time, I needed to know how they would do it. I found this great info that tells me the whole process and procedure.

How is the procedure performed?

The procedure can be done several ways, depending on the type of lump.

If the lump is fluid-filled, a simple needle aspiration in the office is often all that is needed. The skin above the lump is cleansed and then numbed with a local anesthetic. The lump is pierced with a needle and the fluid is drawn off. Usually, this fluid is sent to a pathologist to examine for cancerous cells. In most cases the lump goes away in a few days after swelling caused by the procedure disappears.

If the lump is solid, it is usually removed completely in an operating room or an office equipped for minor surgery. The person having the procedure can choose one type of anesthetic or a combination. A local anesthetic can be injected to numb the area of the operation. A general anesthetic puts the person to sleep

While the person is still awake, the location of the lump is confirmed. Some surgeons mark the spot on the skin with a pen. Then general anesthesia is given or a local anesthetic is injected into the area. The skin above the lump is cleansed and the area is opened. The breast lump is separated from normal tissue and removed for the pathologist to examine. The incision is then closed with stitches or tapes. A dressing is put over the wound and the person is awakened.

Simplified AM Beauty Routine

I like this tips here considering I have very little time left in the morning and I'm off to work, running -- and still LATE.

SOURCE

Step 1: Exfoliate
To smooth and temporarily plump your lips, apply a grainy lip scrub. "Move your finger in circular motions around the perimeter of your lips," says makeup artist Laura Geller.

Use: Philosophy Kiss Me Exfoliating lip scrub, $15; sephora.com.

Step 2: Moisturize
Protect your lips' fresh skin by moisturizing with a super-hydrating lip salve.

Use: Rosebud Perfume Co. lip balm in Brambleberry Rose, $7; sephora.com.

Step 3: Line Lips
Use a lip pencil the same color as your lipstick, suggests makeup artist Billy B: "The barrier will keep your lip color from running."

Use: Billy B Beauty lidless retractable lip brush, $18; billybbeauty.com.

Step 4: Pucker Up
Applying lip color with a lip brush means you won't glop on too much. Start from the center of the bottom lip and work outward to minimize mess. Choose a creamy shade of mauve for a fresh fall look.

Use: Bobbi Brown Creamy lip color in Pink Ballet, $22; bobbibrowncosmetics.com.

Think I'm Brave?

I have been busy lately huh?!
Yep, I just had a core needle biopsy done 3rd of December. Thank God the result wasn't what I always feared. Next would be an operation, a procedure which they would remove the mass. I just got a call from my doctor this morning, explaining briefly how he would do it. Says he would put me to sleep, that even though I watched the whole process the whole time with the biopsy, this one might be a little too much for me to watch. It would need a considerable size of incision, and scar eventually.

Something within me still would rather watch but if I'm sleeping then I would just be cozy and relaxed, I was gonna say it's hard not to watch I feel like I am entitled to know what they are doing to my body, LOL. Even though I pinch my closest available skin as hard as I could with my naijavascript:void(0)l to compensate the pain I might feel just in case while he stabs my flesh.

Some Dating Tips

Here are some holiday dating tips that might be helpful to you. Simple tips but are realistic.

1. Family and romance don't always mix. Be careful about including him or her in family holiday activities.

2. Curb your generosity when buying your date presents or she/he may think you are more serious than you really are.

3. Do something “different” with your date like a carriage ride, skating, sledding or driving around to see outdoor Christmas lights. Unique activities drive up dopamine in the brain and can stimulate romance.

4. Holding hands with your date can affect oxytocin levels in the brain and increase feelings of trust and attachment.

5. At holiday parties, introduce your date to your friends, explain who people are, how you know them, and then continually include your date in your conversations.

6. There is a fine line between bragging and telling your date about yourself.

7. If you are drinking alcohol, be aware of how much you are drinking during your date.

8. Don't listen to everything your friends and family say about your date. You're dating this person, not them.

9. Be on time or call your date and let them know you are running late.

10. If you have the holiday blues, try not to let it affect your date or consider waiting to date until after the holidays.

Find a date for the holidays. Complete Chemistry's personality profile now.

Black, White, Colored

I stumbled upon this poem and it has an ill feeling from the black race. Sad.

A Poem Written By African Shakespeare
SOURCE

Dear white fella
Couple things you should know
When I born, I black
When I grow up, I black
When I go in sun, I black
When I cold, I black
When I scared, I black
When I sick, I black
And when I die, I still black.

You white fella
When you born, you pink
When you grow up, you white
When you go in sun, you red
When you cold, you blue
When you scared, you yellow
When you sick, you green
And when you die, you grey.
And you have the cheek to call me colored?????

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